The first holiday after the divorce will be much harder than the future years.

Like it or not, you may just have to wait out the storm. Especially if you have divorced in the last few months, but even if it has been nine or ten months, there are raw emotions that need time to settle. The new lives that every member of the family is adopting take some getting used to. Much has changed in the kids’ lives—parenting schedules, after-school routines, homes, friends—and the holidays are one more adjustment. Kids can be extremely resilient, and the future will not be as trying as the present. That said, even the most well-adjusted children of the most cooperative divorces need a full “life cycle” (a year of birthdays, holidays, first day of school, last day of school, and vacations) after the divorce to have those new experiences in their changed family.