Monday, November 24, 2008

Eleven Divorce Myths Debunked, Part 4

When people hear the word “divorce,” their minds rocket toward catastrophe. Sadly, those predictions of doom are often true. But divorce itself doesn’t create a crisis any more than a stick of dynamite explodes a building. Instead, a chain of deliberate actions transforms what could be simple, quick, and inexpensive into a costly, messy, and time-consuming debacle. Family and Divorce Mediator Matthew M. House, J.D. corrects some common myths about divorce so that the public is not terrified by the prospect of their lives collapsing just because a marriage ends.

MYTH #4: If my spouse won’t budge on joint custody, we’ll go to court, and the judge can split the difference.


TRUTH: That is a huge misconception. The court cannot and will not order joint custody unless both parents agree. Furthermore, the standard parenting guidelines don’t provide anywhere near an equal division of parenting time. If you want a fair parenting time schedule where both of you will have great access to the kids, the best way is often to write your own agreement, either by yourselves or in mediation, without going to a judge.

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