Why is divorce often so overwhelming?

How kids accept divorce depends more than anything on what the parents say and do. Divorce overwhelms only the kids whose parents let them be overwhelmed (or even want them to be). Your job is to care for your children regardless of how bad you feel. Don’t do anything that your kids can observe that would make them think that the divorce—a choice you and your ex made—is going to ruin their lives. You should write into your divorce agreement how both of you will talk to your kids and how you will minimize their fears. Words in a dictionary don’t ruin lives—people do. If you tell them that divorce will wreck their happiness, you are admitting that you are either planning to or won’t try to prevent it. Maybe you don’t know how to prevent it, but many professionals can help you. Whether you see a mediator, a therapist, a life coach, or all three, divorce does not have to ruin your life, and it will not if you decide to overpower it, which you can do.