Do-it-yourself Divorce? Don't.

The tight economy has made people cut unnecessary expenses from their budgets, which is usually a very responsible decision. However, there are certain things that it’s just not wise to skimp on. As a divorce mediator, I have to go on the record to urge the public to strongly consider not using a “do it yourself” divorce kit or service. This is an important enough area that you need to consult with a professional. Even if you fill out some of the paperwork yourself to cut down on your costs, you need a professional mediator or attorney to navigate the process for you.

Do you need a lawyer to fill out paperwork and file it for you? Not necessarily. People make a big deal about the divorce paperwork as if it is something mystical that only a person with a law degree can possibly figure out. That belief is not accurate. Those who want lawyers to handle the documents for them are usually just too overburdened, rather than being too stupid, to do it themselves. The challenge is a logistical one, not an intellectual one.

However, the best reason to hire a lawyer or mediator (preferably the latter) is not because of how to fill out the paperwork, but rather what to put into the paperwork. The questions that the basic state or county forms ask divorcing couples to answer are woefully minimal. They will cover your legal bases, but they won’t help you achieve long-term harmony. To do so, you must delve much more deeply into the specifics of parenting, the precise methods of asset division, and the explanation of the support figures you’ve crafted, among many other areas, so that both of you can be confident that your agreement will still function years down the road.