Bringing attention to mediation as the preferred dispute resolution model

Why does divorce have to be such a disaster? As a child of divorce, I wish my parents had used the services of a child-centered mediator. Then, someone might have told them that there was no real point in fighting about money and businesses and home equity. All of those material trivialities aren't worth fracturing a family over.

When my clients do some self-help reading and find the statistic that reveals that 38% of children are still depressed five years after a divorce, I have to stop them to ask "How many of those divorces do you think used mediation?" Probably none, depending on how old those statistics are. Mediated divorces get things done more nicely, more quickly, and less expensively. It's just not even a close call.

Kids tend to compare their own experience to the only other things they know, which are their friends' families' divorces. But most of those, if not all, probably did not use mediation, either. Let's make it a goal that in the next five years, we'll give kids a reason to feel hope after their parents' divorce -- that because they used mediation, families could remain intact even when marriages did not.