Eleven Divorce Myths Debunked, Part 2

When people hear the word “divorce,” their minds rocket toward catastrophe. Sadly, those predictions of doom are often true. But divorce itself doesn’t create a crisis any more than a stick of dynamite explodes a building. Instead, a chain of deliberate actions transforms what could be simple, quick, and inexpensive into a costly, messy, and time-consuming debacle. Family and Divorce Mediator Matthew M. House, J.D. corrects some common myths about divorce so that the public is not terrified by the prospect of their lives collapsing just because a marriage ends.

MYTH #2: The fact that my spouse was unfaithful means that I’m going to get more support payments and sole custody of the kids.

TRUTH: Being a bad spouse doesn’t necessarily make you a bad parent. Spousal support and child support are meant to support the recipients, not to punish the payer. It would be a bad policy to say, “I know my spouse is awful, but the longer I stick it out and the more he or she does wrong, the bigger my payments will be,” and the law doesn’t say that. Fault does not change support payments, in general. The one exception is if your spouse’s behavior is damaging to the children. Then, child support might be higher only because you would likely have more parenting time.